Looking at love and conflict inside our relationships

I wonder if I can make some interesting connection between Father's Day and our trip to the theatre to see She said/He said. Probably not so I won't even try.

The play is our second in the Stages Festival of Eastern Front Theatre. Last week, I told you about Unconscious at the Sistine Chapel. They are two very different experiences.

She said/He said is the creation of Anne-Marie Woods, an award winning multi-disciplinary artist — an arts educator, producer, director and creative consultant. With roots in London, England and Trinidad, her life and career have had no regional boundaries. I think of her as a poet and a spoken word performer but I also remember her beautiful singing voice from when she was part of the a cappella group, Four the Moment.

SHE is a Black woman asking real questions about life. HE is a Black man searching for meaning and understanding. Together, they fight to make their relationship last in a world where “the rules” are always changing.

A fusion of personal experiences and fiction… playwright Anne-Marie Woods conveys in this new work the vulnerability felt in romantic relationships and the importance of communication.

Through compelling monologues, poetry and song, the female/male rapport is laid bare in this tragicomic battle of wits. She Said/He Said is a fresh and nuanced look at relationships through a script that cleverly meanders through the present and past experiences of its two main characters. Where time is subjective, the fourth wall is intermittently torn down… and location though specific is universal. Woods has taken a non-conventional approach to telling a modern day love story.

HE is played by Neville Coke.

Neville is a Toronto born actor and singer of Jamaican and Barbados heritage.

The play is a mixture of dialogue and individual reflection as each of the characters play out the conflicts they feel within the relationship. Some of the emotion they express is common to many relationships; some are related to family and culture that are specific to this couple. A lot about love is universal and it's very easy to get drawn into the lives of others with all their similarities and differences. It's just the kind of thing I enjoy.

Because we were going out, I had announced earlier in the day that we wouldn't have a fancy dinner for Father's Day. But after thinking it over, I changed my mind. We're Spaniards at heart and usually eat dinner around 9:00 p.m. but I thought it would be nice to eat early — a late lunch, let's say — around 4:00 p.m. And because it was a nice day, we had our first meal of the season on the deck.

Usually if we have steak, we have a rather modest piece of meat which we slice diagonally, put on a platter, and share. But every now and then, Dan likes a nice steak all his own. If not on Father's Day, when?

William may look relaxed but he's always on guard when he's outside, on the watch for flying creatures. He doesn't like bees. Or wasps. Or anything that could be a bee or a wasp.

It wasn't really a fancy dinner/lunch but I did make some molten brownies. I even whipped the cream to put on top.

Those brownies are so easy, I can't really take much credit.

Talking turkey

We always have lovely turkey at our house – Thanksgiving and Christmas – so I don't identify at all with people who always seem to have a bad experience. It's a process though.

We get our turkey from our farmer – she takes orders and we pick it up a couple of days before we need it. Her turkeys have lived a good life; they've eaten well, had some freedom, were never treated badly or cruelly. They've never had antibiotics or steroids – or any medication. They've grown up less than an hour from where we live.

It definitely makes me feel better.

The day before we're going to roast it, we brine it. If it's really big, we use the big cooler and just put the whole thing right in there. Dan does the brining and he's used different things at different times: kosher salt, brown sugar, maybe some herbs. The turkey stays in the brine overnight and in the morning, it's drained and dried.

Before the roasting begins, I like to put some nice fragrant additions into the cavity: wedges of orange or lemon, lots of onion, garlic, handfuls of mixed herbs – sage, thyme, rosemary. Sometimes, I take some of those same flavours and use them under the skin. I slide my hand between skin and breast to make a nice pocket and slip in some thin slices of lemon, garlic and whole sage leaves.

I know most people swear by butter rubbed all over the outside of the turkey and I like that too. Who wouldn't? But sometimes, if I've got the lemon fever, I rub the skin all over with olive oil, then with a cut lemon, then I zest some lemon peel all over. I sprinkle with coarse salt and roughly ground pepper and Bob's your uncle!

Then comes the roasting time – and here's one way I like:

You can see that with this barbecue, I could put the drip pan under the rack so the turkey sat directly on the rack. I liked that.

This picture is from Christmas 2009. The turkey's almost done. You can tell by its lovely colour and also by the fact that I'm already fixed up and ready for our dinner guests to arrive.

By 2011, we had a different barbecue. It was good in many ways but, as you can see, the turkey had to be placed into the pan because the rack was too close to the heat source and the pan wouldn't fit under there.

See what I mean?

This turkey still has a way to go. The skin is not yet browned the way it should be and I'm not even dressed yet!

Roasting the turkey on the barbecue is fun. It doesn't seem like as much work, it does seem to keep the turkey moist and juicy, and the drippings are always lovely and brown and make delicious gravy.

If you haven't done it yet, try it this Christmas. I recommend it.

P.S. Of course, I make dressing! I make it in a baking dish. Bread crumbs, onions, garlic, summer savoury, salt, pepper, chicken stock – and some of the turkey drippings drizzled over it for extra taste at the end.